A couple of years ago Brooke (St. Amour) Franklin told me about an excellent book that she was reading entitled, "Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free." The book is written by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. Because I enjoy reading, I immediately went looking for it. Believe it or not, I found it at Aldi Food Store.
DeMoss discusses several lies that women in our culture believe, even though we don't realize we do when we pick up the book. Each chapter describes a specific area in which women swallow certain lies. According to DeMoss, women believe lies about God, themselves, marriage, children, and emotions to name a few. The following are some of the lies that are mentioned:
"I can't control my emotions" (Boy do I hear this one a lot)
"God should fix my problems"
"I need to learn to love myself" (I think the problem with our society is that we love ourselves too much!)
"I can't help the way I am"
"Physical beauty matters more than inner beauty" (most of us would agree with this - but it doesn't hurt to be reminded)
"My sin isn't really that bad"
"I don't have time to do everything I'm supposed to do" (I have bought into this one!)
"I can make it without consistent time in the Word and prayer" (this one too unfortunately)
"A career outside the home is more valuable and fulfilling than being a wife and a mother."
"I have to have a husband to be happy"
"Sometimes divorce is a better option that staying in a bad marriage" (This has become all too acceptable in the church!)
"My husband is supposed to serve me"
"It's up to us to determine the size of our family" (does that have you wondering?)
"Children need to get exposed to the real world so they can function in it"
"If I feel something, it must be true"
"If my circumstances were different, I would be different"
I can go on, but here is a taste of what topics this book dives into.
I firmly believe that one of the reasons why our society and culture have become so corrupt is because women have lost the clear picture that God has provided concerning our role. Christian women ought to be proactive about seeking God's will for their life and becoming the kind of women God desires us to be. It is so easy to buy into the philosophies of this world. Just tonight, while working with the youth group, each of us were asked to mention somebody who has authority over us. When it was my turn, I said, "my husband." You should have seen the look on the faces of some of our church girls! When did the older women quit teaching the younger women? I for one, want to be taught! Therefore, I am challenged myself - and challenge all other women - to dig in and study to see what God intends for us as women. Without even realizing it, many Christian women are whole heartedly accepting the values of the world. We have to purposely guard against this, or we too will view women and their role like our culture does.
If anybody has any good books they would like to recommend, I am always interested!
Sunday, March 19, 2006
Lies Women Believe
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9 comments:
Amen, sistah! I love Nancy Leigh DeMoss' writing. She says things plainly and honestly and engages her reader. That book sounds eye-opening. Oh boy, I am struck with your authority point and the my sin isn't really that bad lie. Growing up in a non-Christian home, my view of husband authority is extremely skewed and non-Biblical at times. (that's not an excuse, I just have to remember that and actively choose to let Matt be my authority instead of doing things my own strong willed way. It also doesn't help that I'm a first born strong minded person and he's the baby of his family with a naturally laidback persona.) God is getting to me lately about my sin. Sometimes I think of myself as a near saint because of the supposed sacrifices I make in being a stay at home mom. I've bought into the world's philosophy there!
May I also say that the devil is using all sorts of subtle tactics to pervert our thinking to the world's instead of Christ's. Oprah Winfrey is my huge bug-a-boo. My mom ADORES her and her teachings - How often have I heard Oprah say to love yourself! That's our problem, we love ourselves so much that we come before God in our hearts.
I would like to comment on the divorce and the children exposed to the real world lies but I'm afraid this comment is already as lengthy as your original post! :) Thanks for stirring up my mind this morning. I'll have to keep my eyes open for this book. Is it still being sold at Aldi?
Alicia,
I certainly apreciate your comments. Speaking of Oprah, I recently noticed a book at the Family Christian bookstore about her. I think the title was "Oprah's Gospel," and it seemed to endorse her teachings about us being good people and basically said that her "gospel" (doing good unto others I think) is "the gospel." Funny how even in a Christian bookstore you can find books that describe the gospel without mentioning Jesus Christ.
I am glad my quick "review" of the book has you thinking.
Even as I was writing this post last night, I was thinking that I need to read the book again. I certainly have areas that need to be worked on. I encourage you to purchase a copy. I haven't seen it at Aldi since the day I bought it, but you can buy a paperback copy at amazon. com for $10.77 new or $5.50 used. It is a worthy investment!
I would like to hear your thoughts on divorce and exposing children to the world. I personally appreciate the view of Dr. Laura Schlessinger on those topics. She is not a Christian (she is a Jew) but she certainly has the right worldview. Don't worry about leaving long comments - I enjoy them and am challenged by what you have to say.
By the way, I have thought this about you long before today, but will tell you now that I admire your loyalty to your family. I think you are doing exactly what Proverbs 31:27 encourages by looking well to the ways of your household - working at home to help your family income and yet being wise with your money by using cloth diapers and making Chloe's PJ's. :) That is dedication! Better go for now, speaking of long comments . . .
-Kel
Kelly,
Well, I'm not sure you would agree with my thoughts about divorce. My parents divorced when I was 13 and I am convinced it was the right decision for my mom. My dad was (and still is) an alcoholic and living with him was dangerous. All that to say that I think sometimes that divorce is justified. For example, an abusive situation would be justified in my book. I don't know about adultery; I can only say it would be more than difficult for me to want to salvage my marriage if Matt was unfaithful. so much hurt there. I think reconciliation should be earnestly sought though in the case of adultery. I know of one wife who left her hubby and 2 children for another man but then repented of her sin 3 years later. By that time the first husband had moved on and remarried. Talk about confusing for those kids!
Don't get me started on Oprah! She reminds of how satan twisted God's word when tempting Jesus in the wilderness. I hope Oprah doesn't get a glimpse of this. She probably wouldn't like me comparing her to satan . . .
As far as exposing kids to the world, my views were much different before I had children. :) Now that I have Chloe I want to protect her innocence as long as possible! My bro & sis-in-laws (not sam, matt's other brother ben) are models to us in this area. They are extremely choosy about the movies they watch at home. They only allow things are totally above board - even watching for bad attitudes toward authority, not just bad words or sex scenes. They evaluate activities before doing them. Some youth group activities they don't participate in because they don't see them as valuable. Or they see them as opportunities for temptation or stumbling for their son, Zach. I used to think that parents could go overboard and be too protective. Now I don't think there is such a thing as being too protective.
There's another long comment for you! Chloe's napping and I don't feel like doing my online work. How's that for virtuous! :) Just kidding, I am humbled by your admiring comment. God has certainly worked a change in me and given me grace to love my role as mommy and wife.
Alicia
Kelly,
are you coming to Lou anytime soon? When you said you were packing your Mary Kay stuff, that made me wonder.
Interesting topics - Oprah, divorce, children/parenting. Chris' favorite thing to say about Oprah is that she's an "agent of moral insanity" (originally a quote by Al Mohler). And I completely understand what you mean about parenting and protecting our children, Alicia. It's sometimes overwheliming to think of, especially the more I find myself in real "shepherding" situations the older Luke gets. :)
Shoot, I did it again. I didn't realized Chris was logged in and not me.
Alicia,
I think I can relate to your thoughts concerning divorce. My parents were also divorced - actually at about the age of 13 or 14 as well. The Lord used that situation in my life to mold me and really draw me to Himself. I also know of a few couples who have HORRIBLE marriages and I wish that I could tell one to leave the other! Believe me,do I wish sometimes that I thought divorce was okay.
I cannot claim to have a clear position on divorce, but I hope to someday as I study it out. I mean I know what I think, but I cannot clearly defend it. I know that is not a good thing. As I see it today, I don't think divorce is Biblical. Marriage is meant to be permanent - a picture of Christ and the church. Regardless of what the church does, Christ doesn't leave it. Regardless of how awful Gomer was, Hosea never left her. I just began reading a book John MacArthur wrote several years ago called "The Family." He dedicates a couple of chapters to the topic of divorce. I know from skimming through it that he is opposed to divorce. I am anxious to read the rest of the book and understand his reasonings.
I do think that there are times for legal separation. I certainly wouldn't advise somebody to stay in a dangerous home!
I want to encourage you to read an article by Debi Pearl and tell me what you think of it. I don't know how to put a link on my blog, so I will just list a couple of quick/easy steps to get to the article:
go to www.nogreaterjoy.org
Click on "topics" on the left side
Click on Marriage & Family
Click on Husband/Wife Relations
Scroll down and Click on the article "Abusive Husband."
Please note that I do not necessarily endorce everything the Pearls think.
I know that I haven't used any strong biblical arguments to defend any position I think I may or may not have. I probably sound very wishy washy. Yikes! Maybe when I do some more studying I'll post something about what I find! That might raise a lot of eyebrows - this can be a very controversial topic to be sure.
Katie,
No I do not have any particular trip planned. However, we do need to find housing and jobs. How did you guys go about doing that? Did you have jobs lined up before you got there? When did you pick housing?
Kelly:
Thanks for the challenge to put Scripture behind our ideas on divorce! Sad to say, I don't have any chapters/verses backing my beliefs. And don't get me wrong, I am VERY against divorce. I just think sometimes it is justified. I'll definitely check out that link - just not today. I have a mile long to do list on my agenda today. Chloe and I are venturing to MI tomorrow to meet my sis-in-law and family so I have to pack, do laundry, etc. etc. etc.
Have a great day in the Lord dear,
Alicia
okay I had to dig for this post. I am now reading this book and I love it! Thank you for recommending
it!
you know I should just email you because I won't find when you reply to this.
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