When I first accepted Christ as my Savior and started growing in my faith, I wrongly assumed that all Christians sought God's will for their lives. The older I get and the more people I meet, the more I realize that most of us simply do what we want in life and call it God's will. I know I am guilty of this. During my college years I struggled with "knowing" God's will. Our dorm supervisor explained that God's will, in one word, is "obedience."
We should not expect the unbeliever to live like a child of God. However, we often see self- proclaimed Christians living like the world. When I refer to worldly living in this post, I am NOT referring to the type of music you listen to or the clothes you wear. I am thinking about how we fail to live our daily lives in accordance with the Word of God. The Bible tells us how we should live, yet so often we knowingly live in a way that does not please God and then claim that we are "seeking God's will." I absolutely HATE it when self-proclaimed Christians live a godless life and try to give God the credit for it. I know that sounds crazy, but it happens all the time! I have heard many women date unbelievers (nice people mind you, just not people who share the faith) and then say, "God answered my prayers by bringing him in my life. I am so glad I waited for God's will - he is the perfect guy for me."
Or how about the woman who decides to live with her boyfriend before marriage and then give testimony of how good God is to bring them together?
What?!?! Do you hear yourself? God's will for your life will not cause you to violate scripture. If you want to live in sin, do it. But please don't be a hypocrite and proclaim to the world that you are living an obedient life. It is NOT right for you to be immoral and shack up with your lover before you're married. It is NOT best for you to be unequally yolked and marry outside the faith. God's will is NOT for you to get a divorce.
You may find a church or a pastor willing to marry you and put his stamp of approval on your relationship, but don't be fooled. God has made it clear what his plan for marriage is. Seek His approval, not the pastor's.
And while I am ranting, let me mention something else. If you want to marry a godly man who loves his family and his God, try being a godly woman. It amazes me how women will live totally contrary to the Bible and then wonder why they can't find that godly man they are looking for. Perhaps it is because a godly man would never date a woman like you. If you're going to marry a nice man who provides for his family and treats you well, but isn't a Christian and doesn't fear or love God, then don't complain when he won't go to church with you on Sunday. Don't be frustrated when he doesn't share your world view and has a different code of ethics than you. Don't expect him to lead the family in prayer and Bible reading. Don't be so foolish as to think he will model for the family what a godly man is, because he can't. Don't be angry when you bear his children and they grow up to be like their Daddy and not love the Lord. Don't be surprised when your kids don't choose Christian friends and they rebel against you.
There are some things you don't need to pray about. I don't have to pray about whether or not I should steal from my employer. I don't have to ask God if it's His will for me to cheat on my husband. I don't have to beg God to show me whether or not He wants me to lash out in anger and beat my child. The Bible is pretty clear that I ought not to do any of these things. Likewise, you do not need to ask God if you should marry an unbeliever. You don't need to ask God if you should lose your virginity before your wedding night. You get my point.
If you're not a born again Christian, then this post doesn't apply. I am just sick and tired of hearing stories of one Christian after another stray away from the Lord and yet claim they are living for Him. Let's just be honest. Call it what God calls it: sin. If you are living in a way that contradicts God's Word, and yet you feel no conviction for this, I urge you to do what Paul says. Examine yourself to see that you are in the faith.
Monday, May 05, 2008
Speak the truth in love
Posted by Kelly Glupker at 8:57 PM
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12 comments:
This is such a good post Mrs. Glupker!! I totally agree with everything you are saying. Thanks for being such a good example!
very true Kelly. Yikes! it´s like they aren´t reading their Bible at all. John really has a problem with the mentality of not confronting anyone, in Europe. People who are going to church, but living with their partner. I´m so grateful for my husband. He is not afraid to say something.
Wow! I had no idea you were the preacher in the family. I agree with everything you said. Pastor Mark preached on Romans 14 on Sunday. The theme of this chapter is that we should not pass judgement on "disputable things." There are many things that Christians mutter about that are not clearly defined in Scripture, and cause divisions among us. But there are other things in which there is no doubt what God's will is. Romans 12:1-2 makes it clear that, if we are to find God's perfect will for our lives, we must first submit to Him (be living sacrifices).
Kelly, what a great post!! Sadly enough their are people in my family who fit this post to a tee..I just continue to pray that God's will be done in my marriage and our life, so that we can shine a light to those that are in the dark..
Those were some really great points Kelly. God laid out a clear plan for marriage that most of the world and sadly some Christians don't follow. Celeste is only 4 years old and I'm already trying to instill in her Gods will for her to be with one husband and to find a man that not only loves the Lord but wants to serve Him. Every Christian I know that did it Gods way has NO regrets. Unfortuantely I have serveral "I wish I hadn't done thats" and its too late for me, but not for my kids.
I agree with Phil. I´m reading the last part of Romans right now. It´s clear that Paul was trying to communicate what causes division. He was speaking of things that one may judge as good and another not so good, but these things were not sin. Deference and perfering one another to guard unity, is the main jist. However, sin is sin. lying, jealousy, anger, bitterness, fornication, adultery, etc.
Preach it Sista Keller! I do know people like this, and it truly makes no sense to me. Thanks for this post!
The only correction I would make, is that if someone is willing to do these things with an unbeliever, they probably do share the same values and worldview as that unbeliever. We will be known by our fruits, and many will say, "Lord Lord." Matt 18 tells me to evangelize these people who rebelliously pursue the world, but claim christ (despite the churches pursuit of them). Ben and I share a college friend in this very situation.
The need for confrontative speaking of the Truth is certainly something that, within the Body of Christ, should be done. I think that it is important also to not just declare the known 'sin' but to also lovingly work at and encourage reconciliation, between that erring believer and the local Body of Christ and also to Christ Himself. What a beautiful picture of the kingdom of God when on the horizontal level, our relationships display the reconciliation that God brought to us through Christ.
To add another thought...while I appreciate it when Truth is spoken in love, I often think that (within the context of relationships between a man and woman) the greatest protest to a life lived in disobedience, and even to an unbelieving world, is a marriage relationship that is solidly biblical and full of the love of Christ...a true First Corinthians 13 love open displayed in all its beauty. To me, that is compelling, and really is what the world is aching for.
Remember that sometimes we can turn people away from God by appearing to be righteous and all knowing, and then they wont listen to us when we try to encourage them in the Lord." A word softly spoken". Dont ridicule, pray and share God's message with Love!
Sarah and Jack, I agree with what you are saying.
Sarah,
I just hope that we that are in the body of Christ can have the boldness to confront in a Biblical way. It's hard to do this when you do not necessarily have a close relationship with the "believer" in sin. I struggle with this. I always feel like someone "close" to them should bear the responsibility, yet many Christians are simply tolerant. And I agree, solid marriages are certainly a testimony of God's love.
Anonymous,
In my post I am referring to people who claim to already have a relationship with God. Usually these people are familiar with the Christian faith, often having grown up in a CHristian home. However, as they get older, they stray and perhaps have never truly accepted Christ as their own.
I think we need to be sure to share what the Bible teaches rather than our own opinions. It's harder to turn away from God than it is from another person who just thinks differently. I'm not entirely sure I understand what it means to encourage someone in the Lord who is living in sin. I do think we ought to pray for these people, but I also believe what Proverbs teaches, "Open rebuke is better than secret love." I would rather be the friend who opens the wounds than the enemy who kisses them (Proverbs 27:6) I agree with you in that everything we do must be done out of a heart of love. We must be careful to not do it with a heart of acceptance. While God does love us, he also hates sin. While we share the message of God's love, we need to share the message of his hatred as well. Again, I am referring to people who claim to know Christ, not the average joe we meet on the street.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
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