Wednesday, February 08, 2012

He Loves Me in Spite of Me

I'll be honest. Being called back to the bedroom after the kids are tucked in for the night really irritates me. I'm ready for a break and for some peace and quiet. It doesn't happen every night but when it does I'm afraid I can respond like a bear. The last thing I want to hear is "MOOOM! I need my sheet fixed. MOM! I need another drink! MOM! I have to go potty again!" Regardless of the fact that they go potty, get a drink and get their sheets and blankets tucked in around them, they still manage to find a reason to call me back into the room.

Tonight I tucked them in, gave kisses and hugs and said prayers. As soon as I sat down I heard Owen yell for me.
I marched down the hall, swung the door open, flipped on the light (which I only did to express my annoyance. I know - immature) and growled, "WHAT!?"
Owen sweetly responded, "I just wanted to ask you to have Daddy come see me when he gets home."
I took a deep breath and explained, "Daddy won't be home for a couple of days. Now please go to sleep. Whoever calls me in here again will be disciplined. Good night."
I flipped the light back off and before I left the room Owen said, "Mama, can I give you a hug and a kiss?"
Of course I couldn't turn that down so I walked over and bent down to hug him. He wrapped his arms around me and patted my back and said, "You're a good Mama. I love you."
Talk about immediate conviction! My son loves me and responded kindly to me even though I did not treat him with love and kindness. He loves me in spite of me. I'm not excusing any misbehavior, but I needed the reminder he gave by the example he set. Even when angry, respond in love. Respond with kindness. How much more effective would my corrections be if I had enough self control to be sure that I seasoned everything with grace? It wouldn't have been appropriate it and I wouldn't have let him get away with it, but it would have been understandable had he responded to me with attitude and anger. I so desperately don't want those negative responses to be a part of our family life!
Tomorrow is a new day. A new opportunity for me to do right and to be the good Mama my son already thinks I am. I want to live up to his expectations for the glory of God.