A Disturbing Trip to the Playground

Today after I left work I decided to take Owen to a nearby playground that I had never been to. Upon arriving I realized that this playground was owned by a daycare center. Owen was allowed to play there, as long as I was with him, and there were several other young children (age 3 and younger) who were under the supervision of five daycare workers. It was a beautiful playground, just perfect for a child Owen’s age. The daycare itself was in a very nice building and the parents that came to pick up their children were all nicely dressed men and women who drove nice vehicles and had their kids nicely groomed. I imagine this daycare is not cheap, considering the “niceness” of everything. I was there a total of one hour, but it didn’t take that long for me to be reminded once again that I am so, So, SO thankful that God has allowed me to keep my son out of daycare! It’s no secret that I do not believe daycare is in the best interest of children. I feel badly for those families who have no other options, and there are certainly many families that are in that boat! Unfortunately there are also many families who could keep their children out of these facilities if they were willing to sacrifice: live in a smaller house, drive an older car, shop at yard sales and cut out new furniture and expensive vacations. Most of the negative feelings I have toward these daycare centers is based upon statistics, books I’ve read and things I’ve heard. But what I actually witnessed today confirmed what I already felt.

For easy reading, I’m just going to write some bullet points of those things that really bothered me today.
* Although there are benches surrounding all sides of the playground, every one of the workers sat on the same bench chatting to each other or texting on their cell phones. Therefore, even if they were to look up, they could not see three quarters of the playground.
* A few of the children did not have their shoelaces tied and kept tripping, but nobody noticed.
* One child had a verrrry dirty (and smelly!) diaper on. Of course the daycare workers aren’t going to notice that on the other side of the playground.
* Three boys kept throwing wood chips and pine cones in each other’s faces – but again nobody was there to stop them. One worker finally intervened when a little boy completely knocked another kid to the ground and the screaming began. (And yet some people think daycare is good for socializing our children!?! I’ll never understand that argument. I want my children to learn from me and their Daddy how to socialize, not from an undisciplined brat on the playground. Owen gets all the socialization he needs at our weekly story time at the library, church, play dates with our friends and regular trips to the park).
* One child hurt himself in such a way that he ended up with a huge black and blue goose egg on his forehead. I wondered how the workers were going to explain that since nobody witnessed it.
* At one point, (and this bothered me the most) I took Owen over to the swings. A little girl around 18-20 months of age followed. She pointed to the swing next to Owen’s and said, “swing.” The swings were right next to the bench where the workers were sitting. I watched as they ignored her request to swing. Finally I walked over to the women and said, “This little girl wants to swing. May I put her in the swing and push her? I’m pushing my son so it’s really not a problem.” I’m sure they have a policy that says something about not letting strangers handle the kids. One of the workers replied, “No. She doesn’t need to swing.” Then, looking at the girl the lady said, “Caroline, go play with something else.” Caroline began to cry and kept saying, “swing, swing.” The worker simply raised her voice and said, “CAROLINE! NO! Now go play!” I felt so sorry for this little girl. She just wanted someone to push her in the swing, but apparently the workers were too busy sitting on their bench. Caroline was left to herself to cry.
* One of the children was running and lost his shoe. Another, much younger, little boy (I would guess 18 months of age) picked up the shoe. He didn’t steal it, he wasn’t refusing to give it back, he simply saw it and picked it up. A worker yelled to the little boy to give back the shoe. I don’t think the little boy understood what she was saying. Irritated that she had to get up, the worker walked over and without stopping or even slowing down, she ripped the shoe out of the boy’s hand as she passed him. How rude! The toddler stood there clearly confused as to what was going on.
* The workers constantly seemed annoyed whenever they were interrupted or had to deal with a child. Two children were especially cute and they seemed to get some extra attention. But otherwise, the kids were treated like irritations.
* I was able to hear bits and pieces of the conversations going on amongst the workers. I heard one of them say, “Yeah, she’s not allowed to be alone with the kids yet, but we still let her.” Later I heard one of the women say, “I’ve just recently decided to start dating other women. I just want to see what it’s like.”

During the hour I was at the playground other parents came in with their children. It was very obvious which child was there with his Mommy and which one was there with a paid employee. Those with Mommies always had somebody watching them, cheering them on as they climbed up the ladder, encouraging them as they braved going through the tunnel for the first time, warning them to get off the slide before another little one came down, kissing them when they fell, wiping their snotty noses, giving them water when they got thirsty and making sure their little darling was having a fun, safe time at the park. And those children under the supervision of a paid employee? Well, let’s just say that they didn’t have a cheerleader on their side. They barely had anyone watching them play. Once again, you just can’t buy “Mommy Love.”
When parents arrived to pick up their daycare kids, everything seemed great. The workers smiled and the kids seemed happy. I wondered why the kids were happy. Was it because Mommy was now there? Was it because today was a typical day for them and therefore nothing to be upset about? Was this all they knew? Either way, it saddened me.
Obviously not all daycare centers are this way. And, again, I know that some families have no choice but to put their child in daycare. I know that I have a very unique situation in which the Lord allows me to work and my child gets to go with me. I am SO thankful! However, it is still true that NOBODY can love your child like you can! When I tucked my little boy into bed tonight I gave him a great big hug and kiss and had a heart full of thanksgiving. I am so thankful that I am my kid’s mom and I’m the one training him and watching him develop every day! I wouldn’t trade this job for the world!

Oh, and one more thing (for the very few of you who have read this far!) - This daycare center was a nonprofit, religious daycare.